Ahhh!

My dad and I just got home from seeing I Am Legend with Will Smith.

It was pretty good. Very creepy and some very scary moments. Also involves the death of a very loyal dog.

A "cure" for cancer instead leads to widespread rabies infection. Yikes.

Anyway, that is my short review. I would recommend seeing this one.

Haha....cats

I just stumbled upon this site called http://www.icanhascheezburger.com/

LOLCATS are the newest thing. They are hilarious!!! At least I think so. But I have a very stupid sense of humor. I think stupid things are funny. My mom just says stuff like this is "weird."

And cats are just funny even by themselves.

Goats/sheep

Here are four really BAD pictures I took today. At the top are Oscar and Felix, the ones that are a little bossy. The bottom one is a little pygmy goat. Alan said I can take pictures of all the animals, and that I can show people around if they come on Friday at 12:00. I don't know why these came out so weird. I need to read the camera manual.

----

Today I wore my new jacket because it was very cold and rainy. I cleaned up the goat/sheep area and raked through the back part. All the poop got stuck in the mud.

Then I went with Alan to feed the pigs. They got an early lunch, which consisted of 1/2 cup of chow and 1/6 cup of produce. We threw out handfuls of popcorn outside for them so they wouldn't bug us inside. We straightened out their beds and cleaned out their water bowl.

Then we went over to the rabbits and cleaned out their area. They were out of rabbit food, so Alan had to go and get more. He said Elizabeth, the other string seven keeper, doesn't like physical labor, so Alan always has to do everything.

Then we went to the lemurs. Their cages had to be hosed and cleaned. Elizabeth didn't do this either. Alan said she brought lunch for everyone yesterday. Heh.

Alan started by raking the back, empty cage. The lemurs in the front cage started screaming; they didn't like the sound of the rake on the concrete. The lemurs in the other cage didn't do anything.

Then he started hosing the cages to get anything stuck on the floor. He had me do the first cage.

Then we took out all the food containers and plastic toys to soak them in bleached water.

Next week I'll go and take some pics of the lemurs. They like to stay inside during the winter.

Alan said the lemurs are feeling better, after we gave them their medicine last week. That's good!

So it was a very good day again!

Oh yeah. This morning I sorta kinda cut someone off when changing lanes. They honked at me. But on my way home, someone on their cell phone slipped into my lane right in front of me. I didn't honk at them, though. So there.

Haha

The latest from http://stuffonmycat.com/

New pics

New camera

My grandmother from San Francisco gave me a new digital camera for Christmas. These are some of the first pictures I took with it.

Ummm

About that tiger attack....

I've been inside the tiger's night house here at Oakland, and the only way I can see them getting out is if someone let them out. Even though that's a horrible thought. But those cages are locked and chained and just totally tiger proof. And each tiger has its own cage.... so every cage was open at the same time??

OMG

I'm watching the news and they just had a story called "SF Zoo Tiger Attack"

A few tigers got loose at the San Francisco Zoo, and one of them killed a visitor and injured two others. Police later shot and killed this tiger.

Yikes!

This is very tragic. I don't understand how in the world someone could let the tigers get out. But they did.

Merry Christmas!!

Merry Christmas, everyone!!!

We just had our Christmas morning and opened all our presents.

I got some really cool stuff! I got a whole bunch of Pokemon cards (which I wasn't expecting), but, even at my age, I still love getting them. I also got a gift certificate to J-Crew and the Sanrio store. So a trip to the mall is in my future.

I got a portable speaker for my I-pod. So I can play music in my room, or in my car. I also got a car charger for the I-pod.

I got Blake Lewis's CD (the runner up in American Idol.)

I got two calendars, one featuring frogs and the other featuring grizzly bears. I also got a weekly planner with pictures of horses.

I got a lot of other stuff, too, but I won't bore you by listing everything.

Later today everyone is coming over for dinner. My mom is cooking the turkey right now. She also is making cranberry sauce and baking an apple pie. Yay!

On Saturday we went up to San Francisco to see a play of The Christmas Carol. It was pretty awesome. Beforehand we walked through a part of town where all the shopping malls are. Nordstroms, Macys, the Gap, etc. My grandmother wanted to show us all the Christmas decorations. One window at the Macys store featured real kittens that are available for adoption.

I am having a great Christmas so far!

I hope you all are having a great Christmas too!

Hungry lemurs

It is now 1:00 and I am back from my second day at the zoo.....

It was a very great day.

I parked in the lot right behind the children's zoo. I got there at about 7:45. Then I walked into the keepers' lounge.

I tried to open Elizabeth's locker, but her sweatshirt was jamming it. So someone helped me.

I waited for Alan, who came in at 8:04.

Alan separated the sheep and goats again. I cleaned up the yard and swept the cement near the barns. While I did this, Alan went to feed the other animals.

I spent a long time on this. I was still working on it when Alan came back. Then he said, "well, I really only spend two minutes cleaning the yard." Well, I did an extra special job then. Heh.

Then I started cleaning the back area. There was a lot of mess there too.

Alan told me that he needed to feed the lemurs a type of medicine that helps their digestive tracts (since Chester wasn't doing so well.)

So we went to where the lemurs are. Alan brought a bag of grapes, a syringe, and that medicine (I forget what it's called.)

We had to poke a hole in each grape and fill it with the medicine, using the syringe. Alan got this idea from the bat keeper, who used it to help the bats.

Each lemur required seven grapes to get the full dose they needed. Chester required eight.

So.... Alan said he didn't feed them this morning so that they would be hungry.

And they were hungry. While Alan prepared the grapes I went into the lemur cage and brought one lemur out at a time. (This was not easy to do as they all wanted to come out.)

They would take one grape out of my hand with their mouths. They chewed pretty quickly, stuffing the grape in their cheeks and then mashing it down with their pretty sharp teeth.

Most of them sat with me and ate them. Then I would put each one in a new pen, so that we would know who was done and who wasn't.

A couple lemurs would race out of the pen and then run right up the piping that goes up the wall and along the ceiling. I had to shoo them off with a broom.

Eventually those ones ate the grapes. One of them refused to get down, so I reached as far as I could to feed it to him.

One of them, Lillian, lost interest after the fifth grape. She just would not eat the last two. She would take one in her mouth and then drop it on the ground.

Then Alan cleaned them off a little, because some of the medicine had leaked out of the grapes. After this she ate them just fine.

The last one did the same thing, except Alan left me alone to deal with her. A girl named Amy came while we were doing this. Alan took her down to get some extra hay.

The last lemur ate all her grapes, so all them were fed and happy. Some of them wanted more, and others just didn't want to have anything to do with it.

----

This whole process of feeding the lemurs took about an hour. So after that my time was up, it was 12:00.

Now I am here eating my lunch.

Alan seemed a lot less stressy today. He even made a joke. Amy sneezed while she was wrangling the hay, and Alan said, "that's why they call it hay fever." Haha.

Anyway, I don't know where my mom is... she's usually home at this time of day. I tried calling her cell phone, but she didn't answer. Oh, well.

So bye!

@#$%

I just got a traffic ticket.

My mom sent me to the mall today (why would you send me on a Saturday? idiot).

There was absolutely zero parking. I went against traffic trying to get into a different aisle. Then I just came home.

So great idea, mom!!

Oh no, CUTE!

It's 1:00 on Friday and I just got back from my first day at the zoo.

I got up at 6 and left at 6:40 in case of traffic. Well, there was no traffic and I got to the zoo at 7:20, 40 minutes before I was scheduled to start.

I stayed in the warm car for a bit and then went into the zoo at about 7:40.

Even at this hour there are a lot of keepers and volunteers running around. I went into the zoo kitchen, where the volunteer sign in sheet is. Victor told me to come there first.

I told one of the keepers that I was looking for Alan. She said he wouldn't be in until 8. Then a couple minutes later someone radioed Alan to tell him that I was there. I recognized her as the tiger keeper. She was very impatient with us over the summer. Her attitude was like, "ok just get this overwith, will ya?"

Anyway, Alan said he would come up there to meet me.

Alan is very nice. He's a little weird. I don't know. It's hard to describe. He's very stressy.

He showed me the birds first, which were right outside the kitchen.

The three diferrent bird species take very different diets. Every night Alan prepares their meals so that he can just easily feed them in the morning. The kookaburras get three meat balls and a 18 worms to eat. The others get various veggies and fruits, as well as some bird seed.

After that we went down to the children's zoo.

He corraled all the different goats and sheep together and separated them by temperament.

Two of them are no longer open to the public. They tend to ram into the kids, and one has huge horns. Their names are Oscar and Felix. Zoo keepers aren't allowed to tell the public the animals' names, even though every animal has one. This is to prevent people from distracting the animals or interfering with training.

Heidi is a very nice, very old goat. She is currently retired from the petting zoo, but she lives with the others.

The little pygmy goats are very (cute). Oh, yeah. "Cute" is the forbidden word in zoo keeper language. It is NOT to be used. This is because even the cutest animlas, like the meerkats, can be very "dangerous," or at least not pleasant sometimes.

A woman from the Conservation Department, Sarah, thought it would be fun to work with Alan this morning, too. So she was there. She used the forbidden word, but Alan didn't say anything. He just made fun of her.

Sarah and I raked the goat/sheep yard for poop. This took a while becuase they have a lot of space. I had trouble with my raking/shoveling technique at first. I realized that I had to be more forceful with my raking. Yes.

Later Alan wanted to trim the goats' hooves. Sarah and I were to hold them while Alan trimmed. We started with Heidi, the sweet old goat. She started shaking. Apparently she has arthritis.

Then we moved on to Oscar and Felix. They were not easy. We had to manhandle them, and Alan pulled Oscar along by his horns. Felix ended up laying down on his back, which worked.

-------

All the zoo keepers have their own lockers. They decorate them with personal pictures and magnets. One had a Johnny Depp picture on hers. I think that is really cool. These people just have so much fun at work. They have so much fun being together. It's really an ideal situation. I would love to work in an environment like this.

----------

Anyway, next we moved on to the pot bellied pigs. Their names are Joanne and Paulie.

They make so much noise! Snort, snort! When you feed them they just attack you, and then they promptly dump their food bowls over. Alan said it's ok to throw some popcorn at them to get ino their pens without them bullying you. We locked them outside because it had warmed up by then.

One of the pigs also has arthritis. She takes glucosamine, just like Max did.

Then we cleaned out the rabbits' home. We had to push them outside so we could scoop up their water and food. We went into their outside area and cleaned up a little out there. As we were doing this my volunteer keys fell out of my sweatshirt pocket and I couldn't find them. Alan found them and I decided I would put them in my jeans instead. Now I just have to remember to put them back when I'm done, which I almost forgot to do this morning.

Ok, then we went to the lemurs.

There are eight of them, and they were all inside their night dens, which are basically a couple cages with little doors for passage in and out.

One family of lemurs is bullied by the other, so they don't go out at the same time.

So all the lemurs were corraled together inside these cages. They get a couple handfuls of warm carrots and bananas. To feed them you really need to watch out. They run all over the place, jumping on things and sometimes even on you. They will take food right out of your hand. But they don't fight each other for it.

Oh my god, they are so (cute). I love them. They just have these amazing little hands and eyes. They are like very agile cats. One of them was making a cute little clicking sound.

Unfortunately one of them has diarrhea. His name is Chester, and I remember meeting him over the summer. Chester looks like a female, with very large breasts. But this is due to a hormonal imbalance brought out by his castration. Poor Chester. Alan doesn't know what's wrong with him. He's still eating normally. (But he probably gets made fun of by all the other lemurs.) Heh.

Alan is not the usual String 7 keeper. He works only two days a week, and another keeper works the other five days. Her name is Elizabeth and I also remember her from the summer. She's the one who let us hand feed the lemurs. So I know she's really nice too.

Today I had so much trouble opening doors and locks. Every one is so different. I guess I'll get it soon enough.

After I was done I had lunch at the main cafeteria. Food from there is free for volunteers.

Next week I'll park at a place that's closer to the Children's Zoo.

So... that was my day. I had a lot of fun and I wish I could go more often.

-------

My mom is currently setting up our "wrapping station." We have to start wrapping our presents. Now I am going to go buy some hot dogs and then help my mom with the wrapping.

Shopping

Today my mom and I went to Domus, a store downtown.

We bought some presents for people. I also found a really cool floppy hat that my mom will give to me as a "Christmas present."

I saw Michael today and taught me about ETEA. Event, thought, emotion, and action.

Yay!

Well, I just got back from the zoo.

I met with Victor, one of the volunteer coordinators. He was very nice.

He said that new volunteers should work once a week, and later on they can choose to work more days.

I chose Friday. There were several strings available on this day. Like the giraffes, otters, bats, some birds, some primates. Victor said the African animals string is very labor intensive.

But I chose the string 7 with the lemurs!!!!!! It was available!!!

I chose the morning shift, which starts at 8 and goes til 12. I will have to get up very early. Like I did when going to school. But it's really worth it, because this is the time of day when all the animals are out and when they make the most noise. The gibbons today were very loud.
My string covers a bunch of animals at the Children's Zoo. The list goes as follows:

Sheep and goats
Pot bellied pig
Rabbits
Lemurs

Long billed corella
Princess parrot
Kookabura

Victor said that not many volunteers choose to work at the Children's Zoo because there are a lot more exotic animals elsewhere. So he was grateful I chose this. But I think that working with these more "domestic" animals will be way cool.

Working with the giraffes, etc. would be cool too. But it wouldn't be as hands on. The goats and rabbits you can touch (with permission of course).

So I am very excited. I can start this coming Friday.

I'm glad I will be at the zoo when there aren't many people around. If I signed up to come later in the day, there would be a bunch of kids running around the Children's Zoo. After my shift I can sit and have lunch.

Volunteers get to park on the very top of the hill, past the main entrance. It's called the camel lot because it is directly behind the camel exhibit.

While I'm there, I can hang out in the keepers' lounge room. I can meet other keepers and other volunteers there.

....... so I am very happy.

It smells like Christmas

We got our Christmas tree yesterday.

It is very big and full. I like it a lot. It didn't take us long to pick it out, even though there were so many to choose from.

We put lights in it, too.

Today my dad and I are going to the mall to buy my mom some birthday presents. She wants a nutcracker and a Ricky Martin CD. Ok.

Well, today is our first day without Max. We are still very sad.

We have been listening to Sounds of the Seasons on our onDemand music channel. Like nonstop. My mom is continuing to decorate the house, and she has all her things piled on the table. She realized that she has a ton of candles. But I like candles.

We still have to set up our wrapping station. We use the table for this, too. I usually write the to/from tags and she wraps the presents. I'm no good at wrapping.

Tomorrow is my meeting with Victor from the zoo. He wants me to go to the main entrance and have someone radio him to let him know that I'm there. He will tell this person where I should meet him. I hope they know how to radio him. Does he have his own channel? I wish he would just tell me a place to meet him and I could just go there. I have to go at 10, which is when the zoo opens. Oh, well.

We watched The Santa Clause with Tim Allen last night. That is such a great movie.

In memory of Max

My dad just got in the car to take Max to the vet to be put down.

Ok

I was upset when I wrote that last post.

Thinking about it now, I KNOW that Max was loved and well taken care of. I know we did a good job.

The only thing I truly regret is that we didn't know he was in pain.

I know he was happy because he always would stand at the door whenever I returned home from somewhere.

And he would get so excited when people came over.

Yes, Max is the best dog in the world.

-------

We are going to get a puppy after this whole mess is over.

I know I said I didn't want another pet, but of course I was just writing nonsense.

Not another golden retriever. But maybe something smaller.

Or whatever dog we find that we just have to have.

My dog has stopped eating his dog food. I give him my leftovers; that's the only thing he eats.

We took him in to the vet today to get some x-rays and for a look at his mouth.

My dad just got back.

Max is very sick.

We have to put him down next week.

--------

What's truly tragic about all this is that Max has not been enjoying life. He's been riddled with problems ever since he was a puppy. I think he is intensely bored too, at least he has been recently.

He sleeps all day, just like me. He doesn't eat anymore, a pleasurable part of life for everyone.

I don't know how I will mourn yet.

I feel so guilty because Max is my dog. I didn't take care of him well. Just like my rats. It's my fault they died because I couldn't see that they were hurting.

So this will be a shitty Christmas.

I don't ever want another pet again. I'll just kill it.

Ring ring

I just got a call from the Oakland Zoo.

They want me to come in on Monday for an interview and scheduling.

So yay!

Other than that, there is no news really.

Back home

Well, I'm home from my grandmother's house.

I had a really good time. I helped out at the store.

Now I just got back from my appointment with Michael, the therapist.

....... Apparently I have a lot of water energy. I am also an empath. I read other people and their energies.

He advised me to hug other people when I meet them instead of shaking hands. This would avoid a sweaty mess and it would also shout that I am approachable and friendly. He thinks this is a very brilliant idea of his.

Well, I will give it a try.

He predicts I will have a boyfriend at Las Po and that his name will start with a "J". He's like, "Jason, Jacob, something like that." Yes. We will see.

He's kind of a nut. But I like him, and he likes me. He thinks I will "kick ass" some day.

Whatever you say, Mike.

-------

Now I don't know what to do. So I will just sit here, thinking of something to say.

Well, I can't think of anything. Sorry.

More interesting things will come in December, I promise. Right now I am sorta not doing anything.

I hope you all are having a good day.

And Joellymo, happy belated birthday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We were thinking of you on Thanksgiving, even though that wasn't your actual birthday. Anyway, we will see you soon. Like in the summer.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Well, Cirque du Soleil was pretty amazing. This photo is from the one we saw, Kooza.

The tight rope walking was very impressive, as was the juggling act. There was a cool unicycle trick too.

But most amazing was something that I cannot possibly explain. Just trust me. ....Yeah, I don't even know where to begin.

Anyway, we all had dinner first at Momo's, right across the street from AT&T Park. I had the Yankee pot roast. It was very good.

So today is Thanksgiving. We are going to San Francisco again. My mom has been instructed to make an apple pie, but that's all the cooking we have to do. My grandparents are doing everything else.

For Gram

Yes, I am definitely coming to your house after Thanksgiving!!

I am looking forward to it.

Bummer

Well, registration for classes started today.

I stayed up til midnight so that at 12:01 I could start registering before anyone else. But the website said registration would start at 7 am.

So I decided I would do it as soon as I got up in the morning. I woke up at about 10, but I had severe cramps. I also couldn't stand for more than 5 seconds because I felt really lightheaded. Someone did not want me to register.

I laid on the floor of my room, with the web site up. Every couple seconds I was able to register for one class. I got my ASL, English, and math. But all the biology classes were full. There were about ten bio classes. All full.

So I signed up for American History. This class is required to transfer.

Now I only have one class on Monday. The history class is two hours on Wednesday only.

No classes on Friday. So that leaves four days to potentially work at the zoo.

Gah. Next semester I am waking up at the exact moment registration begins so I can get that stupid biology class.

But I've always loved American history. It's the first half of US history; next semester I will take the second half (Civil War to present.)

I was supposed to meet with Michael, the therapist, today, but he canceled the appointment.

But this week is still very busy.

Tomorrow I am seeing Cirque du Soleil with my grandparents, aunt/uncle, and cousin. And parents. I think this will be really cool. It's at AT&T Park, the baseball stadium. A big tent on the parking lot.

I always watch this on TV.

Then on Wednesday, I am seeing my dermatologist. I am going to ask about laser acne treatments. Blech. I think I will feel much better if I get that.

I am also seeing my psychiatrist on Wednesday. She doesn't know that I have been seeing Michael. I feel like I am cheating on her or something. Oh, well.

Then Thursday is obviously Thanksgiving. We'll have a big dinner with everyone at my grandmother's house in San Francisco. I think my mom is making apple pie.

Then after that..... I don't know.

A lot of anxiety has left me since I have finally registered. I was worried that my classes would all be full. And that did happen for one of them. But everything is ok. I'll just take bio next semester. Unless some idiots try to mess up my plans again. Idiots. That class should be for ME.

Anyway, this week will be good. I will have something to do instead of sitting around the house watching Extreme Makeover and What Not To Wear.

Ah yes, Extreme Makeover. You have to see it to believe it. People who have "ugly " faces and overweight bodies apply to be given, well, extreme makeovers. Extensive plastic surgery.

We're talking nose jobs, eye lifts, ear pinning, liposuction, breast augmentation, fake teeth, ..... on and on. At the end, these people look absolutely nothing like they did when they came on the show.

My mom is worried that I am getting ideas about plastic surgery. No, I am not. I just think this show is fascinating.

Max (dog) has the beginnings of a lesion. I don't really know what that is. It is completely independent of his spinal arthritis. We have been giving him some very strong pain killers and now he can actually walk again. Why does Max have so many problems? Is it because he's old?

----------------

Now I don't have to worry about school until January 22. That will relieve a lot of stress.

Ok, I am going to get in the shower. Bye!


OK I DO NEED BONEHEAD MATH. But, bio actually counted for FOUR units, so those classes would have added up to 15. Heh.

And now that I am not even taking bio, I only have 14 units. AHHHHH! So next semester I need to take 16 units.......

Idiots. Messed up my plan!!!!

I'm excited

I just got back from the zoo orientation.

It went very well. A volunteer docent explained about the operations of the zoo and all the volunteer opportunities available.

I want to work in animal management. This entails cleaning and feeding and other dirty things.

I don't want to work with children. That was a question they asked me in the interview.

Then we went on a guided tour of the zoo. The docent we had spent many minutes talking about each animal and explained various anecdotes. It was a little tiring hearing her talk on and on, but I did. Her husband works with the elephants, and she probably spent twenty or thirty minutes talking about them.

She kept asking questions about the animals, like little facts. "What's the difference between a monkey and an ape?" "How many vertebrae do giraffes have in their necks?" I was the only one who knew all the answers. I know that if someone else stood there giving all the answers I would be very annoyed. So I guess I was annoying. Oh, well.

She didn't go through the children's zoo, where some cool animals are. The alligators and tortoises are there. So are my good friends the lemurs. Afterward I had lunch there and went to visit my friends. They weren't in the back, high up in the trees like they usually are. They were huddled together in little balls on the very bottom of their encloser. I should have taken a picture of them with my phone camera.

Apparently at this time of year the zoo keepers like to put pumpkins, or parts of them, in with the animals. We saw a lioness playing with one. She tried to keep it from rolling down a pretty steep hill, but it fell anyways. Then she fell right after it.

Days are divided into two shifts for volunteers. The morning shift starts at 8:00, two hours before the zoo opens to the public. This would be a great time to see the more shy animals come out. Of course you would have to get up super early.

I have to wait about two weeks, due to the holiday, to be contacted by the zoo and set up for another interview and scheduling. I would be assigned to what is called a string. Strings are headed by one particular keeper, in charge of several different species. Keepers don't work with just one specific animal. One string has 200 animals from 30 different species. That is the extreme though.

So I don't know what animals I would be working with.

Only eight people showed up for this. Six of us went on the tour. I didn't really know how many to expect.

I am very excited about this. I'm bummed I have to wait so long to get started. But oh, well.

When school starts I will have Friday, Saturday, and Sunday off. I can work on any of those three days.

You have to be willing to work at least six months. That's easy for me. After all the training you have to go through, you need to give some of that time back.

I had to give written proof that I've had my tetanus booster and tuberculosis test done. So I did that. Most people didn't have theirs.

This could be a very cool experience. I am really looking forward to it.

----------

I signed up to take American Sign Language for my fourth class. You need to take a semester of one foreign language, so that's that. The other ones offered are French, Italian, and Spanish. (Boring.)

I'm all set

That orientation last night was very cool. We each got a whole packet of stuff, including a daily planner.

My test results indicated that I can go right into transferable unit classes. In other words, I don't have to take Algebra 101.

All the classes I will be taking will count for UC and CSU credit. So that's good.

You need 12 units per semester to get an AA degree from Las Po. To transfer you need 15 units.

English 1A is 3 units, Math 20 is 5 units, and Biology 31 is 3 units. So that's 12 units right there with just three classes.

So now I need to find a fourth class, worth at least 3 units.

I have no idea what to take. The counselor recommended I take something that "uses the other side of the brain."

There a lot of classes that interest me, but I am not sure these use the other side of the brain. Like marine biology. But I am already taking a biology class. I'll save the zoology class for the fall, I guess.

I like the Intro to Drawing class. That could be fun. Or maybe I should take some sort of history class.

I have a list of all the subjects and areas I need to take classes from in order to transfer. So I will look at that.

I also know I am not going to sign up for anything that starts at 8 am.

Anyway, I am very excited about this.

Tomorrow is the volunteer orientation at the Oakland Zoo. It starts at 10. I am also very excited about this. You have to fill out an application and do a little interview.

My mom says I need to dress nicely for this. She got on my case when I delivered my Sanrio application in not so nice clothes. Ok, I get it.

I don't know how this will be organized. Maybe you sign up for different sessions. Like some volunteers will start in December, and some will start later or something. I don't know.

I just need to be able to work during December and January.

Or maybe they won't even accept me at all. Then I'll really be in a mess.

I also don't know how many people will be there. The orientation takes place in the education center, which I think is one really big room. When I spent time at the zoo over the summer, we always met in this room at the beginning of the day. But I'm not sure that that's the real education center.

I figure I will go in early, like 8:30. You don't have to pay for parking when you go in this early. Then I will probably pay for entrance into the zoo and look on the map for the edu. center or just ask someone where it is.

They also take you on a tour of the zoo. Even though I know where all the animals are, I will do this with everyone else.

The weather people on the news keep changing their minds. First they say it's gonna be nice on Sunday, then they say it's gonna rain. Now they say it's gonna be nice again.

I really, really hate this weather. I admit that yesterday felt very nice outside, but I want the cold to come back.

I guess what I mean is I really like the weather, it's very pleasant, but it's coming at the wrong time. Am I just over-reacting??

Sigh. (I hope my mom will just drive me to the zoo tomorrow because I don't like driving there myself. This will probably annoy her.)

In other news, Barry Bonds has been indicted. What is the world coming to?

So.... I hope you all are having a good day!

My mom just told me she isn't going to drive me tomorrow. Oh, well.

*cries*

Sorry I haven't posted in a while. Nothing new has really happened.

Well, last night I took the assessment tests for English and math at Las Po. They were ok. The math had a lot of pre-calculus stuff on it.

Today I am going in for a counseling orientation to discuss my "educational goals." I'll find out what classes I'll be taking. Or signing up for.

I am very sad today. My dog has really bad arthritis in his spine. Starting a couple days ago he has been limping severely. He can barely walk. So my dad is going to take him to the vet, hopefully today.

This problem that Max has is eventually gonna kill him. One day he won't be able to get up at all, not even to eat.

So I don't know how much longer he will make it. This really upsets me and I am not happy right now.

I know everyone loses pets at some point in their life. My two rats died the summer before last. I was really sad about that because they didn't live as long as rats are supposed to live. One died of a nasty skin infection and the other one died shortly after due to loneliness.

I sat with Bernie, my cat, for a long time this morning on the couch. He likes to drink water out of the fridge dispenser. So I filled up a little bowl for him.

Bernie is very fat, and he's getting fatter. The vet said that he should not gain any more weight. We feed the cats both low fat and regular food. Of course we can't make sure Bernie eats the low fat food, because we put both kinds out for them. I don't think we could get Bernie to eat at a different location than Posey.

So my pets are kind of a mess.

Max just looks horrible, with his one eye and that sad look on his face. I can't stand it.

Anyway, I will report back later today after my school orientation.

It can't be!

I just got back from the Golden Skate.

I really am no good. My sister changed her mind about going. So it was just me and my mom, and my mom didn't skate.

There were a whole bunch of little kids running around all over the place and then a couple of really good adults. I was the first person to start skating.

-----

On the news the other day, they said just before commercial: "The Giants resign top veteran." And it's like, Bonds??? But no, it's Omar Vizquel, who is great.

Yuck

It took me a couple days to get all the signatures I needed to leave. Some Foothill staff and administrators needed to sign.

But now I have them all and I am all checked out.

On Thursday my mom suggested I go to the mall and buy something in honor of this occasion. So I bought some jeans and a pair of shoes.

Today we are going roller skating at the Golden Skate in San Ramon. I always like doing this.

One of the people that needed to sign my form was the campus supervisor and she needed to have my parking permit back. The attendance lady said she would sign for this instead, but she wouldn't sign until I gave her the parking permit. Well, the parking permit this year was a sticker that goes in the lower corner of the windshield. I could not get this thing off the car. I tried scraping it off with my key, and that didn't work. Then I tried using a razor blade. Some of it came off in little shavings. So the next day I saw the actual campus supervisor and she said not to worry about the parking pass - she didn't need to see it all. Now there is this ugly blue and gold mess on my windshield.

Last night I saw Man vs. Wild: Sahara Desert. This time he ate a live spider and a live scorpion. He also came across a cobra and tried to get it to bite his bag of supplies. Then he peed on his shirt and wrapped it around his head. On the previous episode, I forget where it was, he drank his own urine. He just drank it straight out of his body.

Next is part two of the Sahara. Apparently he dives inside a dead horse, looking for water.

Ok, so now I am waiting until it is 12:00. Then we can leave for the skating rink. I used to be really good at ice skating, but I am very bad at roller skating. So we'll see how it goes.

I'm done

Well, that's it. My Foothill days are over.

This morning I hauled all my books into the office. The receptionist filled out a form that had a place for all my teachers' signatures. There was also a place for my exit grades, which were actually a lot better than I thought.

Mrs. Bradley wasn't at school today, so I have to go in tomorrow to give her my books.

Today was test day in bio, but I obviously didn't take it. A.J. noticed this and asked me about it in the car. I told him today was my last day. He's like, "are you serious?" Then he said, "yeah, Foothill sucks."

So he understands perfectly.

I also remembered to ask him if he has an i-pod, but he doesn't have one.

I ran today in P.E. along with all the other kids. It was a good way to end my P.E. career. I have P.E. second period, so I had to carry my clothes and shoes as well as my books with me all day.

Everyone was very nice and said they were sad to see me go.

But I'm not sad. I'm happy.

Gram: how would you feel if I came to stay with you for a couple days starting tomorrow or Friday?

Bye bye

Tomorrow is my last day of school. That three day weekend has turned into a two month weekend.

I met with Ms. Edwards today and I forgot to bring my GED scores to show her. She said she needs to give them to some other person who will take them to the principal and then who knows what happens. So I told her I would bring them in tomorrow.

But then at lunch I went in to buy an official copy of my transcript to give to the people at Las Po. For some reason I mentioned to this transcript lady that I got my GED. She asked me if I am going to exit the school. I said yes and that Ms.Edwards is taking care of it for me. But then she said that this process goes through her, not Ms. Edwards. She has a form that I fill out. Tomorrow she wants me to bring in all my books and then sign this form. Then I'm done. That's all I have to do.

So, yes I am feeling very good right now.

The drive to Las Po isn't so bad, but I got a little lost on my way home. I didn't know what I was doing but I was doing the right thing. Heh.

Today the Newb did something very strange. He dressed up in safari clothes and shot magic markers through a laser gun at a dancing stuffed gopher...... This was to demonstrate something that I don't remember. Kids were taking pictures of this with their cell phones. Yes, very strange. He had a lot of fun with it.

I still haven't told A.J. about this. He's gonna wonder why I have all my books when he drives tomorrow. My mom wants me to ask him if he has an i-pod so we can buy him an i-tunes gift card. But I keep forgetting to ask him. My mom is going to stick a note on my body reminding me to ask him in the morning.

So I won't have any more Bradley updates or strange stories about the Newb after tomorrow. No more Mr. "again, chwenty" Lipman. No more stressy Mr. G, who I haven't talked about much.

Mr. G (calculus) is probably the best teacher I have ever had, but he stresses me out so much.

I'll say goodbye to my "friends" - the people that say hi to me when I see them.

I will miss my biology teacher, Mrs. Hansen. She's very cool.

.... I guess that's it.

I won't miss anything else.

So... I don't know what else to say.

I hope you guys are having a good day!

(I have to remember to bring home my P.E. clothes.)

Continuation

So this Michael person wants to meet with my mom and dad later this week. He's really more of a family counselor rather than an "individual" counselor, you know what I mean? I like that. This should work out.

I just got back from Las Po. It's a very nice campus. Tomorrow I am going to drive out there on my own to deliver my high school transcripts. They want those.

I have high hopes for my future there. I do NOT want to be disappointed.

Anyway, the Newb really ticked me off today. We were working out a projectile motion problem. Apparently this baseball player back in the thirties thought it would be cool to see if he could catch a baseball dropped from a blimp 260 meters in the air. Yeah. Well, he caught the ball, but he also broke his jaw and lost a couple of teeth. So this problem was to figure out how fast the ball was traveling. It turned out to be 160 mph.

Then the Newb asked what pitchers today can throw 100 miles per hour. This boy behind me said Randy Johnson, the Big Unit. Well, he used to throw that fast, but the Newb acknowledged that. Then I said Joba Chamberlain. But the Newb must not have heard me. This other boy said Tim Wakefield. He also is has been, but the Newb said "Oh yeah, Wakefield!" Ok, Joba is throwing 100 right now. So I said loudly JOBA CHAMBERLAIN!!?! The Newb did not acknowledge me. .... it is so strange because when I walked into class at the beginning of the period, he's like, "hey Gracie, how are you?" .... so why, Newb? Why didn't you "hear" me?

Whatever. I don't care.

I am so tired today. But I have a three day weekend coming up. Yay!

In the last couple days I've been trying to submit my application to Las Po online, but they won't accept it. They think I am trying to apply as a concurrent enrollment student, someone who attends high school while taking classes in college. I don't know why.

Saturday I received a catalogue of courses for the spring 2008 semester from Las Po and inside was an application. It's two pages and the one online is seven pages. So I just filled that out and when my mom gets home we are going to turn it in in person.

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I was very tempted to avoid those freshman boys today at lunch, but I didn't. I went to my usual lunch spot and I didn't see them. So I didn't have to avoid them. I bet if I had tried to avoid them, I would have ran into them.

But today these two sophomore girls came to me and wanted to talk. They were very nice. I guess I just scream for attention when I sit on my little bench. Huh.

Anyway, Ms. West called me in to see her today. She wanted to know how my visit with my new therapist went.

Oh yeah, Ms. West signed me up to see this guy Michael Rose, some sort of therapist that gets paid by the school.

He is responsible for contacting us when he has time to set up a meeting, but he didn't do this. So my mom called him and he didn't return our call for a while. Ms. West got very annoyed by this and she almost reassigned me to someone else. But he did call back.

So my mom and I went to see him on Friday.

....... he's very interesting. He says the F-word a lot. But he's a lot better than my last therapist, who would have never said a bad word in front of me. Not that that makes her a bad therapist. It's just that it got to the point where she was treating someone else's problems and not mine. I got kinda dishonest with her after a while. Did I already talk about this?

Anyway, Michael is a cool guy. He asked my mom and me millions of random questions. He's very realistic, which is something my last therapist was not.

Ok, I have to go to Las Po now. So I will continue this post when I get home.

New pics

Here are a couple of Halloween pictures, and some pics from my sister's/dad's birthday party that we had today.

There is a slug on the carved pumpkin if you can see it.

???

I walked in my room today to find a certificate on my desk that said: Congratulations! You did it: You passed your GED exam. We are so proud of you!

I got a perfect score on the reading and writing sections.

So that's done. Yay!

Today I totally ran a red light by accident. When I was pulling out of the school parking lot. I may be good at reading and writing, but I suck at driving. Gah.

Random people have been saying hi to me recently. People I don't know and that I've never seen before. One of those people is in my PE class but I had never spoken to her before. She was my partner today in ping pong and she seemed really excited about it. She's like, "you're my partner?" Then at lunch these freshman boys came up and introduced themselves to me. They want to eat lunch with me every day now. The chocolate milk I had bought was leaking pretty bad and they bought me a new one. What is up with this? Why am I getting all this attention all the sudden? Usually when this happens, when someone wants to be my friend or whatever, I don't let them get any closer to me. So I'm not gonna do that this time. I am not gonna avoid them like I usually would. But then I'll be out of school and I won't see them anyway. So oh, well.

I ended up not going out last night. I just didn't feel like doing it. I took a sleeping pill and went to bed early. I fell asleep on the couch and at around midnight my mom told me to go in my bed.

Bradley update: Today Mrs. Bradley revealed that her idea of hell is to be chained to a chair listening to hip hop music. Yeah, that would suck.

We have a ton of extra candy from last night. My mom always buys bags and bags of it, but we don't ever have a lot of trick-or-treaters. It's enough to last til next year.

I guess I'm done with trick-or-treating. It seems like work to me now. I feel bad about last night because my sister really wanted to go with me. She went out with my dad but came back because she was wasn't having any fun. I sort of ruined Halloween for my family.

My mom said she should have known I would do this. I really just decided that I didn't want to go while I was in the shower that afternoon. My mom thinks I was planning this for days but didn't say anything until yesterday.

So now I'm on their Hate List. And I should be. I was very selfish.

Today during the last few minutes of school the other support counselor, Mr. Callaway, called me in to see him. He wanted to check up on me because apparently one of my teachers notified him about my e-mail. I told him that I have been seeing Mrs. West pretty frequently. Since she's not at school every day, he said that I could come in to see him any time.

Along with the mean, horrible, ignorant kids come the nice, compassionate, smart kids. These kids are making themselves known to me suddenly. Through all this hate I have for Foothill, I am feeling love now. Not for Foothill, but towards me. What is happening? Why is this so complicated? I still think leaving FHS is the best choice for me, but I admit there will be some things (people) that I will miss.

I have mixed emotions right now. All of this is butchering my face, making me break out like crazy. Jesus. Lord. The Holy Spirit.

I don't know if my mom will still be mad at me when she gets home. She's the one who put my GED letter on my desk, standing up on my computer. So there is something positive there.

Tomorrow is no school. I don't know what I will do. I will think of something.

Happy Halloween

This is my 100th post.

Bradley update: Our storytelling went very well today. Everyone shared weird stories about things that happened to them or just stories that they've heard. Mrs. Bradley warned us adamantly not to use a weegee (I don't know how to spell it) board. She was very serious about this.

Apparently there is a housing complex in Pleasanton that was built over a burial ground. It's right off the freeway and there is a gas station there. I used it when my car ran out of gas last year. Yeah, last year I was driving to school and I ran out of gas. I never even looked at the gas gauge when I left the house. My car stopped right in front of this gas station and there was a cop just behind me. So circumstances were good. But I'm not the most observant of drivers.

Anyway, a girl in my class who lives there wants to have a paranormal expert come and cleanse her house of any present spirits. I don't know about this. I think that if the spirits are angry, they're going to stay angry.

There is also a local legend here in Pleasanton called the "White Witch of Niles Canyon." Niles Canyon is a road that has no lights when it's dark. People say there was a girl who died in a car accident on this road and that if you drive along it at night you'll see her. I've never been on this road. And I'm never going to be on this road.

Yes, "ghosts" scare me. Do I believe in them? I don't know. I don't see why they can't exist, though. Life is something that no one can explain. What makes us have feelings and thoughts, while rocks don't? There must be something inside of us that is not biological. Do you know what I mean? There must some sort of spirit inside of us. So why can't it live on when our physical bodies are no longer working?

Do you believe in spirits? Have you ever had an "encounter" or unexplained experience? I know I haven't. I don't think.

I remember when I was younger I was lying in my mom's bed waiting to fall asleep. I could have sworn I saw a bottle of lotion sitting on the dresser moving around. It looked like it was dancing. I know I wasn't asleep. But it was very strange. Of course, my mom doesn't believe me. She doesn't believe in ghosts or any supernatural things at all. She thinks it's just ridiculous.

I just don't know. It's all very interesting, though.

Today we had an assembly first period that lasted almost two hours. I guess the teachers didn't know about it until this morning and it screwed up the bell schedule so every class was twenty eight minutes long.

This assembly was in light of the recent suicides. A man came to speak about depression and the twelve "warning signs." He was a much better speaker than the last one we had. I don't know if I learned a lot, but it was very informative none the less.

Mrs. West called me in during physics (again) to talk about things. She said she was proud of me for writing that e-mail to my teachers.

Ok, my sister just came barging into the room saying Happy Halloween and she scared the crap out of me.

Anyway, back to Mrs. West. She asked me if I was at all affected by the assembly or if I related to it. I said that I could identify with some of the warning signs, like losing interest in friends and irritability. But he also talked about suicide and I told her I have never seriously considered it. The speaker said that 90% of teens and adults have thought about suicide at some point in their lives. He means just "casually," but he called this stage one. He also made a point not to drive when you're upset. I have done this and it was one of those times where I thought I should crash my car into someone. So I don't do that anymore.

Tonight is trick-or-treating. My sister and I are going out as ninjas. My "costume" is not really anything. I'm wearing black jeans and a black T-shirt with a silly headdress. I am also bringing a sword. My mom ordered a ninja costume for me but it didn't fit at all. I might wear a black slip or cut up the costume and use certain parts of it. I will put up a picture of us.

My mom is going to order a pizza. Then we'll have some candy. I guess lots of candy. All Foothill teachers were told to have tests or quizzes tomorrow to prevent kids from cutting. Only two of my teachers are actually doing this. But I'm gonna go to school.

Last night I watched Friday the 13th Part 3 on channel AMC. It was pretty dumb and not that scary. Then I watched Dracula 2000. Again just dumb and not scary. But Dracula was very handsome, played by Girard Butler.

People came in some interesting costumes today at school. One kid was Moses. His costume was great. Pretty much all the girls that dressed up looked slutty and inappropriate. And for many of them Halloween is just an excuse to look this way. They'd dress up as Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz and wear skirts that barely covered their butt. Um, Dorothy didn't dress that way. I feel sorry for girls that think they have to be this way to get attention. But I also think they are doing a disservice to womankind.

Anyway, sorry for the super long post today. I had a lot of thoughts going through my head.

Ok, now I am going to ... do something. I don't know what, though. So bye!

Bradley update

I just have to say this.

Tomorrow Mrs. Bradley wants to have a scary story session. She wants to spend the period telling scary stories.

........okay Bradley. Whatever you say.

Ahhh!

Last night I watched the scariest movie I have ever seen. It was on the Sci Fi channel. It was called Jeepers Creepers. Oh my god, it was terrifying. I don't know how to describe it without it sounding incredibly stupid, though. Just trust me. And it did not have a happy ending. I don't like being home alone right now.

Today my calculus teacher asked me to come visit him after I leave. I will do that.

We continued ping pong today in PE. My partner is really nice. We played a couple girls that had no interest in following the rules of the game and just stood there hitting the ball in random directions. What morons. Girls can be really dumb sometimes.

I overheard this one girl talking to her friends and she said that she was "mad" at someone. I just think that is so sixth grade. It's so immature and just stupid. "I'm so like, mad at like, her." Ok, so why don't you say something to her instead of talking about her behind her back? Gah.

I want to get away from these people. I just hope that people are a little more mature at Las Positas. Not that I am all that mature. But do you know what I mean? I just can't stand the kids at Foothill and the way they talk and the way they dress. Maybe I'm just kidding myself, though. Maybe people will be exactly the same at Las Po as they are at Foothill.

There have been a couple of teen suicides around Pleasanton recently. My friend today told me she overheard a girl talking about being raped. I think that girl may have been exaggerating about some sort of harassment situation. But I don't know.

Anyway, not a very cheery day. But I have Friday off, which is a mood lifter.

At lunch today I sat in my car and text messaged my mom. We just realized that we are probably being charged for each message we make. But oh, well. It's addictive.

Well, I can't think of anything else to say. So I hope you all are having a good day/night/whatever it is.

Oh, my mom just got home and told me that Joe Girardi will be the Yankees manager next season. We LOVE him. So we are very happy. Unfortunately, the American League MVP Alex Rodriguez will most likely be gone. This makes me very sad. This team is just falling apart. My mom and I don't know if we are gonna follow them next year.

I'm really glad, though, that I did not bet my mom on Joe Girardi. I thought for sure he was done with managing. He kept saying that "now is not the right time." But he was lying. And I was very wrong about him.

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So I did not like what my mom made in the crock pot last night. It was some sort of turkey thing. I like turkey but I didn't like this.

I am looking forward to dinner tonight.

Nooooo!

The Red Sox won the World Series. They swept the Rockies. I can't believe this. What did we do to anger the baseball gods? Why does this have to happen? Luckily Manny Ramirez did absolutely nothing and even got thrown out at the plate. Moron. While he was running his helmet fell off and hit the back of his leg. It's always falling off because of his dread locks.

My GED results get here Thursday. There is no school on Friday, so I'll have to sign up to see Ms. Edwards on Monday. Then it will probably be a few days before she calls me in.

Bradley update: Well, Mrs. Bradley thinks I was absent from class again. What is wrong with her? Do I have to go back to hating her? Today she had a "doggie emergency" and left us with a sub. We aren't working on anything in class and we never have homework, so I slept again.

Last night I watched Invasion of the Body Snatchers. It was very creepy. The ending gave me chills.

We are playing ping pong in PE right now. This is supposed to last three weeks. Oh, well, it's pretty fun, I guess.

I haven't told A.J. about my whole situation. I don't know what he'll think of it. It doesn't really matter, but I feel bad for some reason. I don't know.

My eye does this thing where it randomly starts burning. It happened while I was driving home today. It's really annoying.

Today I wore my special Halloween socks. I ordered this pair of jeans online and they came very short, shorter than they were supposed to be. So I wore them with my high socks and I looked very stupid. But festive.

Yesterday my sister and I worked on a ginger bread haunted house. It turned out pretty nice. My dad set up some spooky decorations in the front yard. I think I'll put up a picture of them.

Anyway, baseball is over now. I'll miss it. But it will start again, as it always does, in April.

I am going to go see if the Sci Fi channel is airing any scary movies tonight as part of its "thirteen days of Halloween." Oh yeah, that Headless Horseman movie my mom and I watched was pretty stupid. Some teenagers get stuck in "deliverance" country where there are a bunch of "inbreds" who trap them in their little town. Headless kills them off one by one and even gets to ride a motorcycle. Headless Biker Dude. Two of the kids escape and then go on a date. The end.

My mom and sister just got home. So... I am going to ask my mom about dinner. We are getting along now.

Side note: I know what you mean about lucid dreaming. I think that happened to me once by accident. I remember there were dinosaurs terrorizing us and I was thinking, "Ok, this is just a dream. Please wake up now." I don't know if that counts.

Last night I had a dream that I had braces again. I was begging the orthodontist to take them off. Yikes!

I'm hungry, version 3

There are some interesting blogs out there. "My Bladder Cancer Journey." "CumLover." There is one dedicated to the Red Sox win on Wednesday.

Anyway, I just got back from a four problem math quiz. The teacher showed us the answers after and I got one of them right. I should have gotten two because I made a stupid mistake on the last one. And another one I should have gotten too. But the first one I had no idea. So that's great. Yeah, 2pi/3 goes over.... there. Not here.

Bradley update: I slept through English today. I didn't get much sleep last night and I was way too tired.

I have been dreaming very strongly lately. I had a dream that I caught a murderer in the act, and he tried to kill me. But I escaped and took pictures of him with my new cell phone. I gave them to the police. (It actually wasn't murder, it was something else.)

My mom showed me a short little article in one of her magazines about dreams and what they mean. They are supposed to be images and feelings that you link from your past into feelings you have presently. They illustrate your anxieties. Dreams show that you are in touch with your emotions. Well, yes, I am very in touch with my emotions. My mom says she never remembers her dreams. I think she is lucky. They just rob you of sleep and put awkward, uncomfortable images into your head. I've never had a "good" dream. I don't like dreams.

I have recurring dreams about sharks and large bodies of water. They are not fun.

What are some common dreams you have? Are there any that stick out to you as particularly strange or bad?

Last night I watched Final Destination 2 on the Sci Fi channel. It was about a girl who foresaw a major car accident on the freeway and she ended up saving a whole bunch of people by avoiding it. But then all the people she saved started dying off in creative ways, because they messed up "death's plan." Saturday is a movie called "Headless Horseman" and my mom and I are going to watch that.

I sort of missed some of the movie because my mom and I were text messaging each other. We were sitting right next to each other. That is how we entertain ourselves. I've decided I am going to make real live friends at Las Po, so I can talk to them on my cell phone. That would be nice.

I am really glad it's Friday. But who isn't? There is no game on tonight because the guys are traveling to Colorado. Hopefully being home will bring some life into the Rockies and hopefully they will cream the Red Sox.

I also had a test in physics and bio. They were ok. I didn't study for them very much.

My GED test scores should come in the mail by next Friday. So on Monday I'll tell my counselor and then it's up to the administrators to file some paper work. I don't see why I have to be in class while they do this, though. But it's not a big deal anyway.

I am going to have some pizza now. And I'm going to play with my cell phone.

All done

I just got back from the last of the GED tests. They were math and reading, and they were very easy. I don't know why that stupid study book made them out to be so hard. It was good practice anyway.

I have very nice teachers. Every one of them responded to my e-mail. Regardless of how they run their classes and some of the things they do in class, they are very nice people.

By the way, Boston won 13-1 last night. They are winning 2-1 right now. So let's hope I don't have to boycott baseball next year.

Ahh

Ok, those GED practice tests I took were way harder than the actual test. Seriously. I wonder why that is.

Bradley update: Today Mrs. Bradley responded to the e-mail I sent out. Here was her message:

Thank you for writing this even though it must have been hard to do.
Everyone goes through hard times sometimes, so don't be embarrassed. If you want to talk, I am here.
I wish you well.

I really like Mrs. Bradley now. She's not a moron, or a demon, or whatever else I said about her. She's really a nice person. I should have known this from the beginning since she cared about her dog so much. Oh, well. I'M SORRY MRS. BRADLEY.

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Edit: my mom is very angry at me again. I wrote in my e-mail that things have been hard both at school and at home. She can't believe that I have problems at home. She thinks I mean she isn't supportive of me. That is not true. I don't mean that. But there are things about my family that stress me out. So yes, I have problems at home because this whole debacle is really hard on my family.

We aren't getting along right now.

What else is new

I am so stupid sometimes.

Today I stood in line for lunch and when it was almost my turn to order I suddenly realized that I had no money left in my lunch account. I stepped out of line, and then I looked in my backpack. I found five dollars. I didn't want to stand in line again and wait, and they would probably be out of food by the time it was my turn anyways. So I sat on a bench and waited for lunch to be over.

Mrs. West (support counselor) called me in to see her today during physics. She just wanted to catch up. She recommended that I e-mail my teachers and tell them what has been going on.

On this bench at lunch I started thinking about things, and this lunch deal made me very upset for some reason. Ok, I sweat excessively. I hate this. I started thinking about this and how no one is ever gonna want to be with me if I sweat like this. I won't be able to hold hands with anyone.

So I got really upset and I didn't want to go to class like that. I sat in the quad when class started after lunch. Then this guy came up to me and asked me where I was supposed to be. I told him, and he said I should either go to class or go to the nurse's office. I went to the nurse's office and had my mom take me home.

Now my mom is really, really angry. She said she can't stand it anymore. She thinks that everything's about me and that I want to be sad. She said "what can you possibly be upset about now? Everyone is bending over backwards to make things happen for you." I thought about taking the steering wheel out of her hands and moving into oncoming traffic.

I am going to e-mail my teachers now.

Ring ring

I just got back from the test. Actually I got back at seven, and it's now nine.

It was very easy. You get two hours to write an essay and do fifty multiple choice questions. I did it in an hour. So I got to leave early.

We had to put our cell phones at the front of the classroom during the test, but I forgot to get it back when I left. So I had to go back.

There were nine of us total. The others seemed very young, probably my age. I took it at Village High School, which is where the "bad" kids go. Maybe the kids I saw were from Village.

When I went back to get my (mom's) cell phone I saw that most of the people were still taking the test.

Speaking of cell phones, my mom and I just got new ones. They are very cool looking. They take pictures, too. I took a picture of my cat Bernie and set it as my wallpaper. Then my mom wanted me to take a picture of Bernie for her phone, so now our phones are identical. They're black, which matches my hair and my car.

Tomorrow is the social studies and science tests. Those should be much harder than tonight's test.

Testing, one two three

Tonight is the first GED test. It starts at 6:00 and goes til 9:30.

I met with Ms. Edwards again today and she said it will take about a month after I get the test results for the district to exit me from Foothill. That's ok.

I tried to to look up the application process on the Las Po website, but it said they're only accepting apps for the Fall 2007 semester. I called the admissions office to ask about the Spring 2008 semester and I got a recorded message saying: "We are now accepting applications for Spring 2008." But the website doesn't say this. So I e-mailed the school with my question and I received this response: "We are now accepting applications for Spring 2008." Thanks. But you're wrong. Then I looked on the website again and it had a link to Spring 2008 applications. I swear they updated their website after I e-mailed them. I'm not crazy.

I learned today that Mr. Lipman is a homophobic idiot. Apparently J.K. Rowling made a statement that one of the Harry Potter characters is gay. Someone brought this up in class as part of an economic current event project. Lipman's like, "Why would she say that? What is wrong with her?" Um, maybe she said that because it's the truth. He thought that her saying this would hurt the book. But he also thought she was slamming one of the characters by calling them gay (dumb/stupid). Believe it or not there are gay people in the world, Lipman. And they're not stupid. The other day he made a lame joke about two guys who came into class under the same umbrella. What a moron. He's in a position of authority and he's acting just like all the other ignorant high school kids. Again, what a moron. Again, again, again..... !

I relate this to when teachers swear in class. Why do they think that is ok? I don't know.

Gah, why are my teachers so horrible?

Bradley update: ...... I don't even remember what we did today.

I had really bad cramps this morning so I didn't do Pilates. Tomorrow is a conditioning run. We just run for as long and far as we can.

I am very anxious right now.

I am going to take a nap.

Okay

My calculus teacher just called my house and talked to my mom. He was concerned about the paper I turned in today. I wrote some pretty weird stuff down. I wrote a conversation between two people about going to college. One of them said he/she couldn't afford it. Now my calculus teacher thinks I can't afford to go to college.

My mom told him that I just turned off after my plans fell into place and I knew I was leaving soon.

Mr. G said he thought I was making a call for help.

He also said he's gonna send an e-mail to Ms. Edwards.

I can't believe I let this happen.

Thanks, guys

The World Series starts on Wednesday and the Rockies are my new best friends.

We are loyal to you all season. We watch you play every single day. And this is how you treat us.

Today we had an assembly and it was the worst Foothill has ever put on. It was in honor of Red Ribbon Week. This ex-addict stood there yapping while swinging his legs back like he was going to kick someone in the shins. He kept talking about how good he felt while he was high. Then quickly at the end he barfed up his message. "Some of you are on the road to death. The seed of addiction has been planted. Some of you will end up in prison. You are going to DIE!" A very powerful speaker.

This assembly made all the periods shorter except for fourth period, economics. Great. Over an hour with Lipman. He made up a funny word today. "Interchangements." Well, he's good for something.

Today was test day in calculus. I didn't take it. I just sat there and wrote down all the things that were in my head. A lot of what I am writing now. I turned that in.

I've been playing Mah Jongg every day for hours. It's a great stress reliever.

Yesterday I went to Del Valle Regional Park. I went by myself. It is a very cool place. I like to take a walk along the water.

Tomorrow is the first GED test. They span three nights, each three and a half hours. I think it's the writing test first. This is the easiest one because all you have to do is correct things like spelling and grammar. You also have to write an essay.

Bradley update: Still doing absolutely nothing.

Steve is a Red Sox fan who's in my economics class. We've been arguing about which team is going to win the ALCS. Today he wore his Boston sweatshirt. I was thinking how sweet it would have been if I could wear my Grady Sizemore jersey that my mom got me for my birthday. Steve didn't say anything to me, which is good because I probably would have punched him in the face. But save your judgments. He's a very nice person.

Anyway, I didn't do much else today.

My mom called Ms. Edwards, my counselor, on Friday to ask her if I could leave sometime this week. She hasn't called back yet.

So I am waiting for Ms. Edwards.

Gram: How would you feel if I came to stay at your house around November 1st? I know you wanted me to come and help out during December when people are doing their holiday shopping, but maybe people will start early.

Bye!

I am full of hate today.

I hate the Red Sox and their fans. I hate that the weather is warming up. I hate the Christian conservatives' "family values." Why are there so many immigrants in the workforce? Because all the Americans have been aborted!

But other than that today was pretty good. My sister and I went to the mall and bought some clothes/toys.

I drove my car for only the third time since I got it. It has new windshield wiper blades.

The Indians are losing after someone hit a grand slam in the first inning, following Manny's strikeout. Why do they always do this? Why?

Anyway, I hope you all are having a good evening/morning/whatever it is.

No champagne tonight

The Indians lost last night. So they have to win it in Boston. C.C. Sabathia only allowed two runs, but Josh Beckett only allowed one.

Today I saw my good friend Jennifer, the one who's gonna be valedictorian, making out with her boyfriend. This is so bizarre because she is the most asexual person I have ever met. He is the boy she went to prom with last year, but I didn't know they were going out or whatever. It was just very strange.

I've always been jealous of Jennifer because she has a really nice body. I guess boys think so too.

Well, I'm happy for her.

Bradley update: Mrs. Bradley gave me a C on this essay I wrote on the Epic of Gilgamesh. She said I write really well and that I have a great depth of thought, but that I didn't use enough quotes from the text. She had said she wanted paraphrasing, not just quotes. Oh, well. Doesn't matter anyway.

We subscribe to People Magazine and one came in the mail the other day. On the cover was a picture of George Clooney and Matthew McConaghey with their respective girlfriends. The caption read: "Sexy men in love!" I think that is some horrible editing right there. Haha.

Anyway, nothing really exciting happened today.

The Indians and Red Sox play on Saturday. Make sure you send Cleveland some good vibes and energy.

Bye Joe

Joe Torre turned down an offer for a 1-year contract to manage the Yankees next season. He would have had to take a pay cut. I guess he thought it was a set up to be fired next year.

The Indians could win the series tonight.

On the Red Sox's 3-1 deficit, Manny Ramirez had this to say: "...if we don't make it, who cares? There's always next year. It's not the end of the world."

I don't think your manager wants to hear that, Manny. I can't believe his comment. He's so arrogant and yet so nonchalant. So you're just gonna give up all the work you put into this season just on the hopes you'll make it next season?

Not that I am not happy Manny isn't trying. The thing is, he doesn't need to try. Things just happen for him. That's what makes him so hate-able.

Anyway, I put up a picture of the Man-eater for you all to look disgustedly at.

I'm hungry, version 2

Happy October 17. I just decided to celebrate this day.

Yesterday I left my PE clothes in bio so I couldn't participate today. But since it was raining all the PE classes were inside the gym and we just played basketball instead of doing Pilates. I locked my backpack inside the teacher's office in the locker room. Happy now, school?

I worked on my GED practice tests today during class instead of doing what I was supposed to be doing. But oh, well. I did pretty well on them.

Today in economics we spent the period in the computer lab researching the stock market. It turns out my partner Jason really does want to do this stupid game. I hope he doesn't mind if he has to do it on his own. The whole thing is just very confusing. Several people have tried to explain stocks to me, but I just can't grasp it.

Today was test day in bio. It was ok. I admit I didn't study for it as much as I usually do. Tomorrow we have to write a couple essays on stuff from four different chapters. They cover respiration, photosynthesis, mitosis, and meiosis. There is a lot of math involved in these four things.

Bradley update: Today Mrs. Bradley demonstrated her poor whistling skills. She claims it's easier for men to whistle than for women. She also says that women float due to an extra layer of fat under the skin. Why did she talk about this? I don't know.

I just learned that there will be a volunteer orientation at the Oakland Zoo on November 17. You need to fill out an application and do a little interview. I hope that works out. That would be a great way to spend my time in the coming months.

That is all for today.

A very worthy post

Ok, so I take the GED next week. And I get my scores back ONE WEEK later. One.... week. It takes SIX weeks to get back SAT scores.

That's TWO WEEKS left of Foothill.

I can't get over this.

Oh, and some new clothes I bought online arrived today. Today is a very good day.

Stupid Rockies

"Again, again, again... chwenty, chwenty, chwenty...." Ahhh, Mr. Lipman!!

The Rockies are going to be in the World Series. This is not right. The Diamondbacks are a much better team. Colorado made the playoffs on a bad call. Holliday was not safe! But oh, well. All I care about is the Indians. They make me happy.

I leave my backpack in the locker room during PE. They want you to lock up your stuff but my backpack doesn't fit in the locker. So I just leave it out. Well, today during class some administrators came and stole stuff out of our packs. They took my cell phone. I had to go to the office at the beginning of third period to get it back from the vice principal. He was trying to make a point. Now he is gonna call my house to tell my parents that I don't lock up my backpack at school. Doesn't that seem a little ridiculous? What are my parents gonna do about it? Scold me? Whatever.

Today in economics we partnered up for a stock market game. Apparently there is a site online that gives you fake money to invest in the stock market. The couple that has the most money at the end of the game, a month from now, will be exempt from taking the written part of the final in January. This thing is not required and I really don't have the motivation or desire to do it. My partner, selected randomly, is a guy named Jason. He seems really dumb. I don't think he'll want to do it either.

I drove A.J. to school today. He said thanks, so I guess he really doesn't mind me driving. It started to rain when we were driving home, and my windshield wipers don't work very well. They just smear the water droplets. But it was ok. I could still see.

Today I am going to the adult education center to register for the GED. I'm taking it next week. I am very excited for this test. Nervous too, because if I don't pass then my whole plan is shot. But that won't happen.

I just tried to call the Oakland Zoo to ask about volunteer stuff, but the volunteer lady is out sick today. So I will try tomorrow.

I recently learned that there is a new addition to the San Francisco Zoo. A grizzly bear. Yes, those horribly terrifying bears that once roamed very extensively throughout North America. I really, really want to see it. But I bet it's one of those zoo animals that always hides in the back of its enclosure. Like the sun bear in Oakland. Still, I think it's really amazing. It's always fun to see something that could kill you if it weren't for some fences and concrete. Even though I like seeing dangerous animals, my favorite has always been the lemur. Remember my time at the zoo? I got to feed them. I'll always remember that.

Bradley update: Today we started reading David and Goliath. Actually, it's just one page, so we finished reading David and Goliath. But, just like Book of Ruth, Mrs. Bradley will somehow find a way to extend the story for another two weeks.

Now I am going to go sharpen my only remaining pencil.